Today’s plan was to notice all thoughts about my body and flood every thought with golden liquid love. Hmmm…It was a full and busy day and I’m not sure I noticed and flooded ’em all. It was a wonderful day. I was with family, I was of service, I didn’t think selfishly of myself and my needs, but was present in each moment to what was needed to increase the love. Ah, that feels good. Talk about some golden liquid love! Let us now relate all of this to the body love topic, Miss Mills. Ok, here goes – the practice of loving my physical self has increased the love for everything. There it is. One of the reasons that I embarked on this journey is that is has become apparent that there are parts of me – areas of my life – beliefs – that are like love resistors. They block the love coming in and going out. Not totally, but more like a semi-permeable membrane. I desire more love, flowing freely. And body image/awareness/hate/love has been part of my thought life for many years. Literally as far back as I can remember.
Seriously…I thought the number on the scale, the waist measurement, the roundness and firmness of my stomach fat was one of those things that I was required by some unspoken law to ponder, obsess over, feel guilty about, protest, complain about. No such law exists. What a concept! I find it remarkable that I am such a physically healthy person, given the barrage of unnecessary and unhelpful thoughts I’ve amassed over the years. I’m a healthy girl! It can be so easy to care for myself. It doesn’t take a lot of work, or time, or pain, or suffering. It takes the willingness to be playful and joyful and to listen. It takes a belief in freedom, a freedom to choose what I want to eat based on my emotional guidance. And not simply what I want to eat, but what I want to do. Or NOT do. Here’s one more thing. I’m sharing this journey; I’m doing the blog, because I can’t let go of any thing that I continue to hide. Vulnerability – Brene Brown – I bet you’ve seen the TED talk. Everybody knows and nobody cares. You care about ME, maybe, but you don’t care much about my thoughts. You can’t until I share them. And they become simple thoughts/fairytales/stories. And they are not me, but they are a part of me that I don’t need. So – you can have them. I don’t need those thoughts anymore.